Day 51. 10 small moments

1. Overall, there have been a lot of silver linings. I wake up focusing on mostly that statement throughout the day. every day.

2. I test out the fit of her new mask after I brush her long hair into pigtails. A different experience than my own, true… but with a small amount of similarity to provide a tiny comfort in the dissonant poetry of memory. I had bright yellow boots, and my long hair was brushed into pigtails. I can only close my eyes and create the story of the generation before me: My mom’s hair being brushed back before being buttoned up into a crisply ironed uniform - oppressive, I imagine, in the endless heat of Legazpi City…

3. I reply to an email asking for my perspective since two of our kids are attending in person and our eldest is online. It’s a rather long email.

4. I put my mask on before walking into the post office for the first time in months. Why do so many of them always feel and smell and look like time capsules of 1983?

5. I absolutely love having lunch with my husband and son. There is something so simple and lovely about the three of us coming from different areas of the house to meet in the kitchen right at noon.

6. I place a dash of cardamom and chopped pistachios into our bowls before I add the fennel soup. It is a love letter that I’ve written to myself., and hidden for mock discovery and delight. I spoon it slowly and savor it and fall in love.

7. Gerrymandering. It’s the main reason I would like to opt out... but it’s also the main reason I am fired up and angry.

8. I hang up their new collaboration piece in our front hallway. Looking at their artwork always makes me feel lighter. There are so many experiences that go along with the art, and this is what I love the most.

9. I order groceries and buy a new stainless steel fridge — all on my phone and all done in 15 minutes or less. There are layers and layers of philosophical and cognitive conundrums with the transactional speed of our everyday reality.

10. Instead of doing laundry, I turn to the canvas and add a thick coat of paint to cover over my last iteration. That statement rings with personal truths.